I remember a dream I had while at the Oneness University in India, in 2015. This dream forewarned me about the issues I would have to deal with during that period at the spiritual center.  

I was in a house with many strangers milling around. One of them—a man, stopped me and told me about an amazing new video game he had just played and enthusiastically asked if I wanted to play. When I replied yes, the scene changed, and I immediately found myself in a brightly lit room with a large TV and a single chair placed in front of it.

Noting that I was alone in the room, I sat down and took the joystick lying on the chair.

This, like many computer games, involved the main character, a boy of about 10 making his way through different rooms, picking up various treasures, while avoiding being killed by the monsters protecting the treasures.

The moment I took the joystick, the boy appeared in front of the screen and waited in readiness for me to start him moving.

Even before I could make a move, a dark shadow appeared from the left side of the screen. It loomed large and menacing over the boy, then without warning, began wildly pummeling and smashing him to pieces. Each brutal punch boomed and thundered in my ear, as the visually and audibly graphic attack completely annihilated the boy—it felt so real and explicit that I experienced every deathblow as if it were happening directly to me, while I sat in my chair feeling shock and horror.

The ruthless brutality of the monster jerked me out of sleep—with my heart still racing.

I think the worst part of the destruction that still comes to mind today, was the sheer terror in the boy’s eyes when the monster appeared. It felt all the more frightening for me, when I later realised the boy in the game was me.

When I looked back and analysed the dream in my mind, it was obvious what the dream was trying to tell me—It was telling me in the most graphic way possible that it was time to face my childhood fears or in other words my childhood demons.

But what are demons and how on earth do go about we facing them?

What is a demon?

Well, If I were to describe a demon, I think I would describe it as the parts of ourselves we are too afraid to see or face. So I’d say a demon is much more than a challenge, although some of you reading this may think of your demons as your un-faced challenges.

For me these demons are the issues you have within yourself that have caused you a lot of pain in the past and which continue to cause you pain in some form or other in your waking life today.

These un-dealt with issues, begin life as tiny seeds—and just like seeds, they grow when watered and fed with sunlight. Your issues grow because you keep feeding them with your resistance and fear of dealing with them.

The longer they remain un-dealt with, the bigger they grow until they manifest into huge menacing monsters that seem insurmountable.

They now have the power to limit you, by stopping you fulfilling your dreams and living to your full potential. They form the barriers that block the path, stopping you from moving forward.

What Do Demons Look Like?

These demons are very likely linked to negative emotions that keep repeating in your life, such as fear, anger, anxiety, betrayal, rejection, unworthiness, sadness, guilt, shame and loneliness.

Some of you may think of your demons as your “dark side” or that part of you that makes you say or do ugly things or that makes you behave in ugly ways. Ways you may hate yourself for—but at the same time, cannot control.

Addictions are a good example of such demons.

We all have a dark side, which is nothing to be ashamed of. The truth is, there are times in everyone’s life when we say and do ugly things that hurt the ones we love. And of course, all of us have also experienced the negative impact of our loved ones ugly behaviours.

So what do we do when we have unresolved issues to face? 

How Do You Face These Demons?

The problem with unresolved issues is that they remain unresolved until you take the time to consciously look at them. Really looking at them means having the courage to see them in their pure nakedness.

This may mean re-experiencing traumatic events or the painful hurts someone caused you, or which you caused others.

It’s true that “what we resist persists” so, it really is your resistance to looking at your issues that gives them the freedom to grow out of all proportions. Additionally, your demons will keep coming back to haunt you time and time again until you stop running away and truly face them.

It’s also important to realize that your demons or issues will not get solved, no matter how much you try to pass the blame onto someone else or try to escape by denying them. Even complaining, screaming, shouting, getting angry or rolling around the floor in hopeless frustration can solve them.

Your issues only get solved when you take the time needed to deal with them step by step.

This means dissecting and peeling back all the layers of the issue. Seeing the other’s part in the action is important, but the most important is seeing the part you played in the creation of the situation.

In my own life, I realized that my demons are not only the hurts that have been inflicted on me, but also the hurts I’ve inflicted to others.

Freeing yourself from your demons is a process, which requires time and consistent effort. If you can try to remember that these demons have taken many years to grow into the frightening monsters that haunt you today, you will be more patient with yourself and not beat yourself up, if you don’t become free of them over night.

you face your demons by sitting with them and experiencing their full ferocity without escaping, without judging them and by allowing whatever emotions you feel to come and go without resisting them.

You can do this by sitting with yourself in meditation, contemplation or by undergoing physical processes.

When you face our demons through meditation or contemplation you must bring up the memory of the person or event you want to look at and look at it with complete honesty.

The 4 Keys To Freedom

There are three keys you can use to free yourself.

1. Being honest with yourself is the first key that frees you faster.

Why? Because being truly honest with yourself, allows you see the truth of the situation with greater clarity. 

2. The second important key to freeing yourself, is forgiveness. When you recognise the hurt you’ve caused others, you must forgive yourself, then work towards forgiving the hurts other people have caused you in return.

Remember that forgiveness is the act that frees you—your forgiveness does not free the other, they must do their own work on freeing themselves.

3. The third important key is acceptance. Accept your humanity, which in this context means your ability to be hurt, but most importantly your own ability to hurt others.

Take responsibility for your actions by accepting and forgiving your past mistakes.

4. The fourth key is letting go. As the pain connected to the issue we’re working on lessens, the easier it becomes to let it go. The issue then becomes a distant memory that no longer has any power over us.

Facing our demons isn’t easy, but when we have the courage to face them, we free ourselves, improve our relationships with others and ourselves, giving us greater potential to live life more fearlessly and joyfully.